Marriage

According to the CDC, literally half the people that get married end up getting a divorce.  Most people that read that fact think only about the 50/50 chance that their marriage will end in divorce...why do people not think about the 50/50 chance that their marriage will last.  I do not think I have ever heard anyone say "Well I got a 50/50 chance that my marriage will last until death do us part."  I always hear "end in divorce".

I grew up in a home where there were no men.  My Grandmother was divorced because Grampa was a ho:) My mother was young when she had me so we lived with my Grandmother and two aunts.  My mom's first marriage failed but I don't remember that guy...her second marriage happened when I was 7 years old and she is still married to my step dad 22 years later.  They have been through every possible storm of life and are still standing by each other and that makes me happy and gives me hope.  

To me and my husband, being married is the best.  It feels good to have someone that is committed to me and our family and who is actually more comfortable and confident in our relationship now that we are married.  The break up factor is not there anymore...because with being married you just can't break up without it costing an arm and a leg. It is an amazing feeling to look at my husband and see all the love in the world in his eyes, and to feel all of that love for him as well.  Our marriage is intense and beautiful and I hope it stays that way.  Him and I love the stability and the commitment that comes with being married.  We both took our vows very seriously and plan to enforce them until the day we die.  

We never wanted to get married until we met each other, we were like most young people and assumed it was a waste of time. I hear alot of people say "It's just a piece of paper".  I used to say that too, until I met someone that made the concept of marriage much clearer.  Marriage is much more than "just a piece of paper".  It is a joining of two souls that were meant to be together.  It is knowing with everything in you that this person is who you want beside you when you are fighting the battles of life.  Marriage is dedicating yourself to just one person in all ways and knowing that no other man/woman means anything to you compared to the one you are married to/going to marry.


Don't get me wrong, my husband and I have our days where we argue like everyone else.  That is a part of living with another person, I do not think there is a couple out there that has never quarreled with each other.


I am hoping that I can still say all of this 20 years from now.  It is rare to see an old married couple happy together.  But boy when you do....it is simply magical to see two old people who have been married for a coons age and still giggling and kissing and loving each other...enjoying one another. All of the memories they share together, watching their grand children and great grandchildren.  It sounds very pleasant and peaceful and I am looking forward to those years on the porch sitting in a rocking chair being old with my husband...watching the grandchildren play and listen to our children complain about the same crap we complain about now.




Marriage can be an amazing journey, to walk through life with someone that is in love with you and dedicated to the relationship.  The important factors in a marriage are trust, communication, loyalty, respect, and Love.  When things get tough talk it out...respect each others feelings and personal space. Weather it is your first, second, eighth, or tenth marriage...enjoy each other and love each other.  

To those of you who are married...good luck and I hope your marriage grows and thrives as the years pass.  For those of you thinking about getting married...do not rush into this, thing long and hard about your decision and make sure you are willing to dedicate yourself to your significant other for life.  Do not think "oh well if it does not work out i can just get a divorce".  That is not how marriage is supposed to work.  If you think your marriage will just end in divorce then you should not get married right now.

Epic Fail Friday

Ah Friday...I woke up this morning happy that it is Friday because today is PAY DAY!  WOO HOO!  On the other hand it feels like it is going to be one of those days.  So I decided to search the web for funny stuff to look at.  I found these pictures below and thought I would share them with everyone.  And just know...there are others out there having "one of those days" too.


 












 


THERE WERE MORE PICTURES BUT THEY COULD NO LONGER BE VIEWED SO THEY WERE REMOVED...SORRY.

Hoarding

Are you a hoarder?  If you cannot see your floors because they are covered with a bunch of junk then the answer to that question may be "yes". 


I was watching the Hoarders show and saw a young woman who said she was never taught the system to prevent hoarding...so i decided to put the information out there for people who may have the same issue..


First...the very first thing you want to do is pick ONE room and start there.  DO NOT try to tackle the whole mess or you will just get overwhelmed.  Start with one room...preferably the first room you walk into when you walk into the house.


Get a bunch of trash bags because you are going to need them.  Now, I have noticed on the show people have a hard time letting things go...they come up with a reason to keep something...here is what you need to do as far as thinking when you pick something up and contemplate it:

1. Is it broken? Throw it out...so what if you think you can fix it...if you have had it this long and it is still broken then it will always be broke. 

2. Is is stained up, if so throw it away, the rest of your home is covered with plenty of clothes/linens that can replace it.  Want to use it for a rag...no, because i am sure when you get further into the home you will find your stash of home made rags and they will be many...no rags...just throw it away

3. Is it dead?  Then throw it away. There is no further discussion on this...dead=throw away/bury.


4. Do you have multiples of this?  If so, break it down to like 5 or less and throw/give the rest away. If you have 5 sofa's then get rid of all but one or two...depending on how much space you have to work with and how much seating you truly need.


5. Is this trash?  If it consists of old newspapers, random papers, magazines, empty cartons or bottles then yes this is trash and can be thrown away/recycled.  Save the earth and recycle all of the things in your home that are trash.


6. When it comes to food, only keep what is up to date, and can fit in your fridge and pantry.  If it cannot fit then you do not need it.  You will not starve or run out of food. Donate/throw away.


7.  If there is mold on it, throw it away...that stuff will make you and your loved ones sick or worse.


8. Get things down the the basics...if you are cleaning your living room, all you will need is furniture, a tv, and a few knick knacks...everything else is NOT NEEDED.


9. When it comes to the kitchen and you have 10 sets of everything...break it down to two.  Have one dish set for every day use and one dish set for company...the rest...donate.  The same goes for pots and pans, storage bowls, anything.  Only keep what you need, you should only need 3-4 pots and 3-4 pans.  When it comes to storage bowls...more than 15 is too many.


10.  Bedrooms...these should only have a bed, dresser, possibly a nightstand, maybe a tv, a bookshelf or desk even.  Everything else can go...clothes go in the closet and dresser.  If you cannot fit anymore clothes in your closet or dresser then you have too many clothes.  Go through your clothes and throw away what is stained up, worn out, holey and keep what is good.  Also, if you cannot fit in something just get rid of it because it is taking up space.  Whatever is in good condition that you don't need, donate it.


11.  Shoes....10 pairs of shoes are more than enough...anything more is too much and should be donated or thrown away.  If you love purses then 5 purses are the maximum and i am being nice here.


12.  If you have things stored in bins and have not seen or used the stuff in years...guess what...you can throw ALL of that stuff away because you did not need any of it thus far so just get rid of it.


13.  When it comes to kids toys...if it is broken throw it away, if your child is 9 and the toy is for a 1 year old then throw it away/donate it. If the child has 20 doll babies...narrow it down to 6.


14. Knick Knacks....Put one shelving unit in the living room, one in your bed room and pick 20 of your favorite knick knacks and clean them up and place them...the rest...donate/throw away.


15.  The bathroom...DUN DUN DUN!!!  Throw out all empty bottles...ALL OF THEM...you do not need them!  If you are saving the bottle just to remember the name of the product...write it down or take a picture and throw the bottles away!!  You only need one tooth brush per person so if you have a bunch of toothbrushes from years ago...throw them out immediately.  You should throw your toothbrush away and get a new one at least every 3 months.  If you are overstocked then organize what you have (only keeping 5 or less of that one thing) and donate the rest.  The world is not going to run out of toilet paper and shampoo.


16. The porch and yard...if there are broken things in these area's...throw them away.  If there are unfinished projects...finish them or get rid of them. 


Life is too short to be worried about keeping a bunch of stuff that is hazardous to your health.  I know hoarding goes deeper than just throwing things away, many people need counseling...but if you are ready to change then try these steps on your own.  When you die you cannot take ANY of the stuff you hold so dear with you so what purpose does it really have?  Do not put a memory into a thing, clean your house up so you can have family and friends over and make memories that way.


Once you get the mess cleaned up, scrub the walls, dust EVERYTHING from ceiling to floor.  I am telling you...when you clean the clutter out of your home it changes everything.  You have a feeling of newness, freshness and freedom.  It is like the closet of your mind is cleared out also.  


If you need professional help then either contact hoarders or contact a local professional that specializes in hoarding.  If you are able to do this on your own then congratulations...you are a strong person.


The best way to make sure you do not get cluttered up again...for every thing you buy...you must get rid of something else.

Summer Time Treats

Summer time is in full swing and the heat is bearing down on us.  Here are some yummy treats I found around the web that are do-able on a trailer park budget:
 I found these little treats on www.glorioustreats.com and they are easy to make and the kids will love them.  Just simply get your family's favorite fruit and find your favorite cookie cutter.  Cut thick slices of the fruit, use your cookie cutter to cut out the desired shape and then take a straw and shove them through.
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These little treats are ultra simple to make...just slice up some of your favorite fruit and stuck a toothpick in it.  Walla quick snack that the kids will think are fun.  I got this idea from www.5papers.com.

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 And last...a simple glass of something cold.  Weather it be the classic lemonade, iced tea, cold water, whatever your heart desires.  Put your favorite fruity drink in a large jug with some ice and serve!
 

Family

To me family does not have to be people related by blood.  Family to me are people that are there through the good, the bad and the ugly.  Someone you are related to could possibly not give a crap at all about you so they are just "relatives" not family.  Family are the people that are there for you...when you fall apart they are the one's that help you pick up the pieces and put yourself back together.  They are the face you see waiting at whatever dark tunnel you had to go through or the one holding the flashlight helping you through.


Family are the people that love you no matter how many mistakes you make, and tell you your being stupid when you are being stupid.  They are the one's that tell you those pants make you look fat...that you have a booger hanging, that you need to get your crap together.  The one's that do that are the one's that give a damn about you, they love you and want good things for you.  They will be the one's that will have your back when you feel like it is against a wall.  When the world comes up against you they will be the one's standing next to you yelling "bring it on b**ches!"  Good friends, bff's....give em your own name...to me, they are family.


My family makes my soul smile.  I have a great family of people that love me and care about me and are there for me when I need them.  They know that I am a loyal friend and will be there one way or another when they need me too.  My family/Friends mean a lot to me and I appreciate every one of them.  I will never forget every time they were there for me and will always return the favor one way or another.  I hope everyone has their own little family that they can rely on to be there when they need them and vice versa.  


It is good for the heart and soul to have a good family...they are the foundation and support beams of the structure that is you.  Without a good solid base and strong support beams, the structure will not be strong.  A good, close family gives a person a better peace of mind...and a healthy mind and soul makes a healthy person.

Carnivals

When i was a kid, going to the Carnival was the best thing ever!  I could not wait to get from the car to the rides and it seemed like the adults would go soooo slooooowww and i could not understand why they could not keep up with me.  I wanted to ride every ride and play every game and top the night off with a bag of cotton candy.  Well now I'm the adult trying to keep up with two older boys while my husband struggles with the double stroller holding the toddlers.  It sucks getting older...I did not realize how slow I have become.  

Going to the carnival these days is stressful but also fun.  The fun part is watching the kids have a good time on the rides, watching their face light up when they play a game and win a prize.  Walking through the crowds is the most stressful part of the whole event for me.  There are people everywhere and all bunched together, my eye's are glued to my kid's backs as they rush through the crowd excitedly making their way to the next ride.   I am one of those people that are so busy keeping a hawks eye on my kids and whoever is near them,  that i am completely oblivious to those around me.   I have ran into a few people in my day and I get frustrated because my brain is saying "where did they come from" and they are probably thinking "she needs to watch where she is going".  

When did carnival's become so darn expensive.  I blew like $80 at a carnival on some crap i could have bought at a dollar tree for $6.  My mom paid $5 for a cup of soda at the carnival...the drink was put in a reusable cup so i guess she got her money's worth because she got to keep the cup.  I won't complain too much though because it was totally worth it to watch my kids have fun playing games and riding the rides...the excited look in their eye was priceless so i won't complain too much.  I remember hearing stories from the elders about how things would cost a nickle.  The economy is so rough these days, even the carnies have to up their prices...but we all have to make a living.    

My favorite thing about the carnival is the cotton candy and funnel cake.  It seems like the carnival is the only place that can make those two things taste that good.  I have tried cotton candy from the store and it is just not the same.  The other thing I like about the carnival is the music, they are always playing some good music and they blast it really loud from the coolest ride.  I had a hard time not busting a move in the middle of the crowd, because me and my little ones LOVE to dance!  My two year old was in the stroller bopping to the beat, it made me really happy to see.  

Carnival's came about in the late 1800's and boy would they put on a show.  The traveling carnival's had magic shows, freak shows, burlesque shows, and palm readers.  Of course back then people did not take kindly to those types of shows so that part of the carnival was dropped.  I am sure there are carnival's somewhere that still offer the full on carnival showcase.  But where I live, the carnival's are rides and game booths and food venders.  There is something magical at a carnival...I remember how it felt when i was a kid...it was like the whole night was kissed with magic.  The lights, the laughter, the excitement in the air from riding the rides....just a beautiful energy coming from everyone that makes a magical moment.  That moment makes carnival time a thing to anticipate...no matter how much you end up spending or how tired you are from chasing kids around all night...you are going to be there again next year!

Carnival time...good stuff.

Protecting our Children

I have 4 beautiful children...three boys and one little girl and they are all under the age of 10.  I love them with everything in me and if they even so much as get a bloody nose i am totally freaking out.  That being said I would like to talk about something that haunts me daily, that makes me cry when i see it on TV or read it in the paper.....I have seen a staggering amount of reports about parents killing their children in the past year alone!  What is happening?  Now lets get real for a second...there are days where my kids drive me nuts and i "want"to ring their little necks.  But to actually "do" that to them...it would never happen.  What is happening?  Mothers are killing their children, significant others are killing children.  This topic brings tears to my eye's because a child looks to us as their parents, or us as adults period for protection and love.


Our duty as adults, parents, people, society is TO PROTECT OUR CHILDREN! They are the future, they are the reason we work every day and attempt to make this world a better place.  The world has become a place where people look the other way and it outrages me.  If i thought for a second that i could possibly hurt one of my children...I would leave and seek help..that would be my way of protecting them.  If I saw signs that someone i knew was hurting my child and could lead to something worse...I would never let my child around that person again.  

I recently read that a mother killed her baby and threw him under a bush and went back to sleep!!! I see over and over "they would not stop crying", "i didn't know what to do", "i just couldn't take it anymore"!!!  There has to be a time where a person has to drop the pride or ego or whatever it is and ASK FOR HELP!!! Send the kid to the neighbor, call a relative or friend...just do not abuse the child. 

When my husband wrestles around with our children and one of the boys can't get out of a hold that my husband has them in they start yelling "mommy mommy" and they want me to come "save them"...of course i say "alright that's enough" and  my husband and children untangle themselves and then the kids attack him because they are free...the point of this little story is...the children expected me to save them or protect them..although they were just playing around they knew that i would make it better, make it stop.  What about the children who's own mother is the one they need protection from...imagine the feeling that comes over them when they realize that their mother is going to kill them or abuse them.  It kills my heart to even think about what could have ran through the minds of some of the victims that are shown or wrote about on the shows and newspapers


I bring this up not to depress you but to just open your eyes and if you see ANYTHING out of place please help that child.  If they look abused, if you notice something off...if your instincts tell you something is not right...look into it, have someone look into it, keep a close eye, DO SOMETHING!  Please do not turn the other way.  I read somewhere that there was a man kicking and slamming a child around in a STORE!  No one did anything about it...oh i woulda...well i will not say what i would have done but the fact is there were grown adults in that same store that just turned the other way while this man kicked this child and threw him down repeatedly on the floor and hit him and the kid was like 2 or 3!

If you are a parent that has an issue with hurting your child or get urges to hurt your child please do not be afraid to get help..and know that all parents get stressed out with their children and feel alone and overwhelmed...just please find another alternative than putting your hands on the child.  No matter what that child love you and thinks that you are like god.